Family Bonds

Last summer I spent some time in Italy with my family; Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and my two children. My Uncle asked me one day, “Why are so many Americans obese?”

I think of that question a lot, especially in regards to my own struggles. I don’t think there is one answer. I think that when we start to look at our society, our extended family, what we eat and the ways we eat, the answers begin to materialize.

I wonder what happened to the extended family in America. Both my parents are deceased however, I do have two brothers that I am very close to. I am also very close to my sister-in-law. Through these relationships, I gain support and insight into the daily challenges of life, marriage, children, and friends. However, I often wonder how different my life would be if one or both of my parents were still alive.

In Europe, families often live in the same town. Adult children stay close to their parents. This creates an unbelievable support system; you can always call a grandparent to pitch in with the kids. Children are physically and emotionally close to their grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins and grow up with a strong family bond. Parents are living examples of how or how not an adult child could model their own life. Of course, it isn’t always great. Obviously there will be disagreements but when the shit hits the fan, blood is thicker than water.

I wonder how many families in America have that family support system. I have always been intrigued by the hit HBO show (and subsequent movies) “Sex and the City”. I can only remember two instances during all of the show’s seasons, where a family member of any of the four major characters ever appeared in their lives. Both were for the character Miranda Hobbs (played by Cynthia Nixon) and both were negative. One episode had Miranda going back home to attend a funeral. During her visit, she deals with the sad and disappointed comments and looks from her hometown friends and family regarding her unmarried status. None of them acknowledge her professional success as an attorney. This infuriates her. Of course her BFF (Carrie) comes to the rescue. Later in the series, Miranda must deal with an aging mother-in-law who is beginning to battle the first signs of Alzheimer's. Other than these two instances (please correct me if I am wrong), the series never had any immediate family members involved in the four main characters’ lives.

I wonder how accurately this show reflects the real lives of the average American? Have we lost the support network of past generations? I don’t have that resource to tap into anymore. Once my mother died, that door closed for me. Sure I have plenty of friends and family but not with the wisdom and insight only a person from my parents' generation would possess.

The question then becomes, without the emotional support often provided from immediate family members, especially parents, am I turning to food to fill a void, an emptiness which at this point in my life remains unfulfilled??

Weekends and Weigh-Ins

Oh no! It is Sunday night and I did the unthinkable!!! I ate Chinese Food the night before a weigh-in. What was I thinking?

Actually, the whole day was a slippery slope. We planned to spend the day in NYC to visit family. We were running late this morning and I didn’t have time to eat breakfast so I stopped by Dunkin’ Donuts for one of those egg white flat bread sandwiches which, I thought was a good choice. Not that it was a bad choice but I was a bit surprised to find out that the sandwich was 330 calories with 12 grams of fat for a whopping 7 points. That is high for breakfast. OK, so moving on.

We go into the City and my niece wants to go to Build-a-Bear. So we go running uptown with my “Sista”, my niece and my daughter. Of course we have a great time but now I’m starting to feel hungry. We head back downtown and fix lunch for the kids. My Sista and I decide to go out for a leisurely lunch ourselves with my son. We leave the girls home with the nanny and my young nephew. We go to a great restaurant and split an asian style salad which was delicious. Unfortunately this “salad” had about two lettuce leaves in it. We also pick on my son’s lunch; he ordered an unbelievably delicious rack of ribs. OK, so I reason that I will just be too full for dinner so I can manage the damage. As we start walking back to my Sista’s apartment my cell rings. It is my hubby (who is back home), asking what’s for dinner and if I could bring home some Chinese food from the City. No problem honey . . . .

I’m sure you can guess the rest. We finally get home after hitting a decent amount of traffic. My hubby and the kids sit down for dinner and I join them just for some soup . . . oh the sesame chicken looks good, I’ll just try some . . . Ooooo, I haven’t had cold noodles in a long time . . . just a spoonful of fried rice. Never mind that I over-ate (at least I think I have because I haven’t been tracking my BLTs - Bites, Licks and Tastes), but do you know how much water I am going to retain from all of the sodium and MSG in that food???? AHHH!!!!

So what to do?? Tonight I will drink A LOT of water to flush out all of the salt. Tomorrow I will take a Zumba class in the morning before my weigh-in. Hopefully I will sweat out the water and toxins I’ve accumulated today. I hope I haven’t done too much damage!!

AHH!!! Weekends!!!

Burgers, Block Parties and Street Fairs

Here it is the weekend again. This past week was hectic to say the least. Although the kids are back in school full time, there are so many meetings and “back to school” events that the days just rush by. I was so busy this week that some days, I didn’t have time to eat. I would grab a yogurt or a banana on the run and come home ravenous which, is not good. Luckily I was able to maintain some control.

Friday night we went out to dinner at a local bar and grill. The best thing to order at a bar and grill is a burger with fries and a nice cold beer (it was very warm last night). I knew that eating that would really put back on whatever I lost for the week. I only had two more days until weigh in, which is the reason why I weigh in on Mondays (it keeps me honest over the weekend). I reasoned with myself that I could always come back on Monday or Tuesday night and have the burger. I would still have time to make up for it before the next weigh in. So, I ordered a Cobb Salad which, isn’t exactly low in points. However, since I had a crazy day, I didn’t eat very much and I had a lot of points left to consume.

Now it is Saturday. There was a big street fair on Jericho Turnpike. I love street fairs. But here I am again faced with things like Zeppolies and “Fried Oreos”. I’ve never even seen a fried oreo before but everyone was telling me how good they were. I took one look at how they were cooked and how they looked and truthfully, the roasted corn and meat on a stick looked so much better.

I also knew that, although the fried oreo may have tasted good at first, I certainly wasn’t going to be feeling very well after I ate it, physically and mentally. The corn and the chicken were delicious and I felt great after I ate them.

I’m faced with one more challenge, the block party! I’m coming prepared with a Weight Watchers Bundt cake and I’ve make a WW Apple Struesal for when we get home just in case I have an urge for more sweets. I am also going into a “safe zone” because my girlfriend is WW savy and she knows I’m back on track. So I feel pretty confident! Wish me luck . . . .

I can not believe it is already Thursday!

This week went fast! Monday was weigh in day!! Whoo Hoo. Of course I don’t always go in excited. Some times I go to WW with a feeling of dread and regret. But let us not dwell on the negative. Monday was a good day. I lost 5.8 pounds. Wow!!! I am already nervous for next week. Losing that much weight in one week is really exciting. It is also a little dangerous because I felt like maybe I deserved a reward, like maybe an apple cider donut? Ahhhh!!

So, in celebration of weigh in day, I’ve decided to share a recipe. This is one of my favorites and it is low in points and delicious. There are a couple of variations which I will explain below.

Chicken “Cacciatore”

Pam vegetable oil spray

1 large onion chopped

2 red peppers chopped

2 zucchini chopped

1 15 oz can diced tomatoes

6 Skinless Chicken thighs or 6 chicken breast

1 vegetable bouillon cube

salt and pepper to taste

1 oz Neufchatel Cheese (low fat cream cheese)

Sauté onion, peppers, and zucchini in large skillet (sprayed with Pam) until soft (about 15 minutes). Add tomatoes and bouillon cube and let simmer for another 15 minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste. Remove vegetables from pan. Spray pan with more Pam and brown chicken on both sides. Add back vegetables to chicken and simmer until cooked through (about 30 - 45 minutes).

Just Vegetables.

Chicken simmering in vegetables.

You can stop right here and serve this with rice or pasta on the side (make sure you include the points for the rice or pasta). I consider it to serve 6 with one thigh and vegetables per serving. The points for this would be 4. Or, you can alter the dish as follows (this is how I make it).

Remove chicken from the skillet and transfer vegetable mixture into a sauce pan. With a hand blender (or you can use a food processor ), puree vegetables. Once pureed, add Neufchatel cheese and continue to puree to make a creamy sauce. Add salt and pepper to taste. Serve one piece of chicken with sauce over pasta or rice.

Using my hand blender to puree vegetables with cheese.

Creamy vegetable sauce.

Chicken thighs with sauce over the top.

The point value remains the same. The cheese is low enough in calories not to add any extra points to the dish. My kids absolutely love this recipe and I’m so happy that they are getting so many vegetables!

Give it a try over the weekend and if you get stuck, just email me or give me a call! Bon Appetite!

No No Song by Ringo Star

If you are old enough, you may remember this song. It is one of my favorites and it was sung by Ringo Starr:

Obviously, the song is all about addiction; drug and alcohol. If I were singing this song, it would go something like this:

A man I know just came from upstate New York

He smiled because I did not understand

Then he held out a bag of apple cider donuts

He said they were the best in the Northeast

Yesterday, we went on our annual apple picking trip. Each year we brave the traffic and drive about 2 hours north to pay a fair price to pick our own apples. By the time we get there, we are all hungry from the long drive. We stop into the Farm Shop which sells all sorts of goodies (baked pies, fudge, candy, apple cider, apples) including my favorite - Apple Cider Donuts.

Just looking at this photo makes my mouth water. Since they are big sellers, very often, we have waited for a fresh batch to purchase. The donuts are always warm, light, moist and delicious. These are a "drug" for me. I can not eat just one. If I have a dozen in front of me, I will eat one after another until the dozen is finished. Then I would go back and buy another dozen. At WW we call these (for me) a red light food. Somehow my "want power" was so strong yesterday that I did not eat any. I knew that if I took even a bite, I would be in a grave situation. I knew that I was one day from weigh in and I did not want to blow all the good choices I made all week for a dozen or two donuts.

I have the same problem with cigarettes. I quit smoking about 10 years ago after having quit many times. The reason why I haven't smoked in 10 years is because I know, with out a doubt, that if I even take one drag from a cigarette, I would be back to smoking two packs a day within 24 hours.

So my response to these delicious apple cider donuts is simple:

No no no I can't eat it no more

I can't zip my jeans any more

No thank you please they only make me wheeze

And then I can't fit my butt through the door

Stay tuned - I will definitely shoot my own video doing my version of this song!

Danger Danger

In 1965 there was a TV Show called “Lost in Space”. It was about a family of astronauts who . . . got lost in space. By our standards today, the show was not very sophisticated!! But I was a kid and I LOVED it !! The family had a robot which was always there to lend a hand (sort of). Anytime something dangerous was about to happen, or was happening to the family, this robot would start waving its arms and say “Danger Danger”.

It would be nice if all of us had a robot like that to help us along in life. Sometimes it is difficult for me to understand how a situation is evolving when I am in the middle of it. I wish I had that “parental insight” over my own actions. I don’t always see the Danger signs. This is particularly true in my food struggle.

If you accept the fact that I eat primarily due to emotions (and I lump a lot into that basket), then the minute I start to feel a certain way, my robot should start making a lot of noise “Danger Danger Christina”. The key is to be my own robot and recognize the feelings before I am overwhelmed.

This week was the first full week of school for the kids. It was a big transition week for all of us. We needed to get to sleep earlier because we were waking up earlier. Of course, we all know how challenging it can be to get back into a routine once the vacation is over. I felt tired all week. Add some PMS and a weekend to that mix. My robot is yelling “Danger Danger Christina”. My plan of action is simple. I will go for a walk whenever I feel those Danger signs coming. I will get extra sleep. I will not put myself in difficult food situations. I will prevail and I will definitely go to WW on Monday!

Where is your “go to” place??

At Weight Watchers (WW) we often talk about the “honeymoon” period. This is when you just join the program, everything is new and exciting and you are happily losing weight at a nice pace. Then all of a sudden the “diet” gets old, the weight loss starts to diminish and the meetings lose their luster. This can be applied to any thing in life.

One of my readers posted a comment about maintaining that “I Feel Good” feeling. So true - I am great at losing weight - I’ve lost “tons” but I always find a way to gain those pounds back.

I’ve been thinking. This is a big topic and I will come back to it often. Let’s take baby steps. Every one has a “go to” place. Mine is food. I go to food when I am feeling fill in the blank. Over the summer, I found myself in the peanut butter jar, very often, after dinner. I wasn’t hungry. Why was I eating peanut butter?? I brought it up at one of my WW meetings but still couldn’t find the answer. Then last Monday, while speaking with my leader about this issue she looked me in the eye and asked “What are you getting from that peanut butter???”. I had my “ah ha” moment and realized that it was “me time”. After dinner, I would send the kids up to their rooms to read a book, take a shower, watch TV, practice an instrument, whatever, just to get rid of them because I wanted “me time” and I didn’t want them to see what I was about to do! I would clear the dinner dishes, fill the dishwasher, scrub the pots and pans and then, I would sit down at the kitchen table with my jar of peanut butter. Of course, the kids would call down “Mom, are coming up?”. I would respond, half choking “I wrill bree rihhit up” (it is tough talking with a mouth full of peanut butter).

We all have a “go to” place. Think about your friends, family, neighbors. Some “go to” that 6pm glass of Chardonnay. Some “go to” the mall to purchase a new pocketbook. Some “go to” the gym and run on a treadmill. All of these places are great in moderation. There is nothing wrong with a glass of wine on Friday night, or a new pocketbook, or a run. But if you are getting wasted every night by 8pm or you are in debt and two months from bankruptcy, or you are obsessed with exercise and on the verge of anorexia, well, that isn’t so good. Or if your BMI is in the obese range and your doctor is afraid you are going to develop diabetes, well, then maybe you and I better change something.

What I need to do is replace my “go to” place with something good for me that makes me feel good and gives me what I really need (I certainly didn’t need that peanut butter). If I need some “me time” after dinner. Then I will go for a walk. It doesn’t have to be miles. It only took me about 10 minutes to have my peanut butter time so a walk around the block would suffice. Or maybe I will get on a mat and do a couple of “down dogs”, a little “chaturanga” and a “twist” to help me digest. And of course, I can always blog . . . .

Hips Don't Lie (and neither does the mirror)

A good friend of mine suggested to me that I read a book called Eating Awareness Training. According to the author, Molly Groger, one of the first steps to lasting weight loss is to live in the present and acknowledge and accept your body as it is right now. An exercise she recommends is to stand in front of a full length mirror, naked, and really look at your body, and accept where you are right now. Yes, I know, if you are like me, that is a very scary proposition. In fact, one of the hardest things I find when I finally return to the gym after a long lapse in judgement, is facing all of those mirrors!!! There is no reality check greater than my own reflection while I am trying to balance on one of those big balls while doing a pitiful “crunch” - OUCH!

So last night, I installed a full length mirror onto the OUTSIDE of my closet door. I’ve always had a full length mirror on the INSIDE of my door but since I rarely go into my closet - none of the clothes in there fit me anymore - I rarely saw myself in full view. In case you are wondering, yes, I stood there in my “birthday suit” and took it all in. To quote Shakira, my “Hips Don’t Lie” and neither does the mirror! Off to the gym!

Note: I am now on Facebook so if you want to friend “Fridgedemons”, just search for Christina Stefanik and friend the “little devil”!!!

I Feel Good

My “old” Weight Watchers Leader used to have this James Brown doll. It was about 2 feet tall and stood on a pedestal with a button. When you pushed the button, the doll would start to dance and James Brown’s signature song “I Feel Good” would start to play. My leader’s message was simple and powerful: If you eat right and take care of yourself, you will feel good. Well she was right. Three days into this, I’ve been making good choices, eating a healthy diet, keeping my portions in control and walking about 2.5 miles each morning and boy do I FEEL GOOD!!! So here is to you Noreen!!! I’m just borrowing your mantra . . . .

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzlpTRNIAvc

By the way . . . . I am LOVING that powder blue pants suit!

Day 1 AGAIN

Hi. My name is Christina and I am a “food-a-holic”. Yup! I am back. About a year ago I started this blog called “Fridgedemons” to write about my struggle with food. I had a lot of hopes and dreams when I started this blog; one of them was to lose weight. Well, here I am, a year later, back at the drawing board. Yesterday I went back to Weight Watchers (AGAIN) after a long (and happy) summer. Unfortunately the results were not good (AGAIN). I wasn’t surprised. I was bummed.

Here it is, Day 1, AGAIN, and I decided to start blogging AGAIN. My goal is to lose 50 pounds. I have also decided to blog about other topics that are important to me so stay tuned, check in frequently and remember to keep commenting!